Game Boy Portraits -- Now Available from Dan Schenker Photography
Is there a sweeter smell than that of nostalgia? Introducing the latest toy in my photographic arsenal, the Game Boy Camera! That's right, folks -- these 256x224 pixel head shots will be the talk of the town! Black-and-white is all the rage right now in the low-end photo market, so snap yours up now before my Game Boy Printer runs out of stickers to print them on.
Pause your Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles VHS tape and check this out! My new gear has a 50mm focal length that will make your Polaroid Instant camera shake in its non-existent Converse All-Stars. I can guarantee that these portraits will be a bigger hit than a slammer on your POGS. A photo shoot with me is quick and easy going. No, don't bring a NERF gun -- I'll be doing enough shooting for both of us!
Any occasion is enough reason to book a photo session. Easy Bake pot luck, Ring Pop engagement shoots -- The sky is virtually the limit! (Sorry, this camera doesn't perform too well in just about any light source.) Luckily, you don't have to be a Street Fighter to book a date and time with me. My calendar is open wider than Kirby's mouth in Dreamland! Just wait until your peers see these stunning 4-bit portraits of you... You'll want to change your name to Optimus Prime because your image will be completely TRANSFORMED!
I understand that my portfolio may make it look like I only work with professionals but I promise you this: I'm willing to work with any average Mario, Luigi, Ken or Barbie. I also know that photographers are a dime a dozen these days, so your decision may be a difficult one. In closing, I choose you, Pikachu, as my number-one commitment, my priority, and of course, the subject of my amazing little Game Boy Camera.